Cards Of Fate
by Reikie22
Summary: Fem!Naru: After the sealing of the Kyuubi, Hitomi uzumaki-namikaze dissapeared leaving only a note in her place. Twelve years later she returns for the graduation exam having been trained as a ninja, and displays unusual techniques not seen before.
1. Chapter 1

"Underlined" = thoughts

"**Bold"** = Jutsu, summon/demon/feral speak

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any Naruto related material.

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><p>It was an average morning in the Shinobi academy, the majority of students were doing their own things in their own social cliques while the two instructors tried, and failed to gain the attention of their students.<p>

The first instructor was wearing the standard chuunin outfit, had shoulder length silvery grey hair and his forehead protector styled as a bandana. The second instructor was also wearing the standard chuunin outfit, but his hair was slightly shorter than his companions, dark brown and pulled back into a loose ponytail. His only other notable features about him was a long thin scar that ran over the bridge of his nose, and halfway into each cheek. The next was his forehead protector, which was worn normally over his forehead and bore the same leaf symbol as all Konoha Shinobi.

"Settle down class," the brown haired instructor called out as the calm chatting had degraded into shouting, with a couple of students starting to throw things around, "Class settle down!"

"Kids!" his voice getting louder with each attempt.

"Give it up Iruka," the silver haired instructor said, "just hurry up and use the big-head Jutsu. You know it's the only thing that'll get their attention. It's been the same the three years we've taught them."

"I know Mizuki," the now identified Iruka sighed, "but I can't help but hope that one day it won't be needed."

With that, Iruka made a few hand-seals and whispered **demon arts: big head no Jutsu** instantly, three things happened; first the size of his head multiplied threefold while gaining a sinister appearance, then flames seemed to dance in his eyes and flicker in his mouth, trying to escape every time he breathed and finally his volume increased as if he was shouting into a microphone which had the speakers turned on full.

"Shut up you little shits and pay attention!"

Seeing that the Jutsu had done the trick and Iruka and deactivated it, Mizuki unplugged his ears and began the standard pre-test speech for the final graduation exam,

"As you all know students, this will be your last day with us, whether you graduate, or come back for more training. I wish you all luck with your exam, and your future career as Shinobi."

"First," Iruka said, taking over from Mizuki, "there will be no written test as your grades for this portion will be based upon the work you have done this year. Your first test wi.."

Before Iruka could explain further he was interrupted by a knocking at the door. At Iruka's slightly annoyed shout of 'come in', the whole class was stunned by the girl who walked in. despite only being twelve, her appearance screamed beautiful. She had waist length blonde hair with read highlights which was pulled into a braided ponytail, she had a heart shaped face and her eyes were an exotic shade of deep amethyst. Her cheeks were framed by three faint whisker marks that only seemed to add to her intrigue. She was wearing a short sleeved, tight black shirt that showed off her developing curves and c-cup breasts, with white for-arm warmers, a cream coloured skirt, a white belt and toeless boots. She had a pouch strapped to the inside of her left thigh and one on the underneath of her right arm, and had black seals on her belt.

Her appearance was that entrancing that even the brooding Uchia and stoic Aburame had notable signs of attraction, Sasuke had a dazed look and his cheeks were tinged red and while Shino's face was hidden by his coat, he had sat up straighter, if that was possible and you could hear his insects buzzing loudly, a sure sign of a strong emotion.

"Ano," the girl said "this is the graduating class 235 isn't it?" at Iruka's nod she handed him a scroll and carried on speaking, "Hokage-sama told me to come here."

"Well then. Why don't you introduce yourself while I enter your details into the marking system," he said after reading the scroll. He then turned to the class, "everyone, we have a new student taking the exam with us so please make her feel welcome. Go ahead," he said, the last part whispered to the girl.

"Err high, my name is Uzumaki Hitomi. I was born in Konoha but I have been travelling with a close family friend since then. My likes include dango and certain animals," please don't let her be a second Anko" both Iruka and Mizuki thought, "my hobbies are reading tarot cards and practising fuinjutsu. I dislike arrogant assholes and traitors." Hitomi the bowed and added, "I hope we can be friends."

"Thank you Hitomi-chan. Why don't you sit…" Iruka said while scanning the class for an available seat, "next to Hyuuga Hinata. Hinata please raise your hand.

Iruka waited several minutes for Hitomi to take her seat and for the rest of the students to pay attention to him before carrying on with his announcement.

" as I was saying earlier, we won't have a written exam which will be substituted with the marks from this year's work, unfortunately Hitomi you will gain a zero for this part having not being here, however it will not stop you from graduating. The first test will be a five minute taijutsu spar against Mizuki. You will be scored on your form, reaction time, speed, flexibility and strength. Next will be the target test and you will be marked on your accuracy. Finally, after your lunch break, we will call you into the back room individually where you will be tested on the three academy Jutsu, **Bunshin, Henge **and **Kawarimi.** You will be marked on the time it takes to perform, the accuracy of **Henge**, and your proficiency in using them in them in the different scenarios they will be required. It will be then that you will pass and be given a headband, or fail and be given the opportunity to return and try again next year." With that, Iruka got up and left, followed by the class.

Hitomi frowned as she watched each of the fights. They had been called up alphabetically and currently a girl with long pink hair was getting to the end of her spar, but so far no one had used anything but what seemed to be Konoha's basic academy style taijutsu and she was getting worried. She was interrupted from her musing when the girl she had just seen fighting and a blonde girl approached,

"Hi" the blonde said, "I'm Ino Yamanaka, and this is Sakura Haruno."

"Hi," Hitomi replied, "err do we have to use the academy style in the test or can we use something different?"

"No silly," Sakura laughed, "if you know something different then you're encouraged to use it. Most first generation Shinobi use it because they usually don't have a chance to learn a new one until they get assigned a Jounin instructor."

"Yeah" Ino agreed, "but enough about that, what's that tarot thing you were talking about earlier, I've never heard of it but it sounds interesting."

"Well it's a form of predicting the future," Hitomi said while opening up the pouch on her arm and taking out a pack of metallic grey coloured cards and started shuffling them, "when you draw them after asking the desired question, they will show some symbols in a certain order and you have to interpret them. It's kind of complicated though as there are only a hundred symbols, with at least ten meanings each and the pattern the cards are placed in and what symbol is placed next to what can affect the meaning you use." Upon seeing their lost faces she sighed and said, "Why don't you ask me something and ill demonstrate. Be warned though, the answer will be vague and it will be up to you to narrow it down. The more precise the question the more accurate the clues and hints will be."

"Ooh me first me first!" Ino squealed, jumping up and down" I want to know how to identify my soul mate!"

"Jeez soul mate, always the romance questions first." Hitomi stopped shuffling the cards and whispered, "Show us now, show us true, the blonde ones answers, reveal to us. I trust you." As she said the last syllable, the entirety of her eyes turned the same colour as the cards and her hands became a blur as she placed twenty cards down in an intricate pattern that seemed to have no order to it. When her eyes turned back to normal the cards gained pictures and she spent a few moments studying them before scooping them back up and putting them back with the pile as the pictures faded.

"You already know your soul mate; he is sweet and gentle and will always put your happiness and wellbeing first. He is misunderstood somehow, represents butterflies but you won't consider him a love interest until you have matured more but he will be a close friend until then."

Ino, looking deep in thought, didn't say anything until Hitomi shook her out of her thoughts, "It's best not to think too hard about it as you may associate the clues to the wrong person. Just keep an eye out for them without actively seeking them and you will realise who it is when you're ready." She said as she got up when Iruka called her name.

Due to her talk with Sakura and Ino, Hitomi missed the other fights and didn't know how the instructor reacted to different styles. When Iruka said go, she got into her starter stance with her feet one in front of the other shoulder length apart and her hands chest height, open palmed and waited for Mizuki to come at her. Her style relied on her using swift redirection blocks and evasive maneuvers until she could spot a weakness she could capitalise on with short jabs in key areas that would allow her to quickly incapacitate her aponent.

After a few seconds of waiting Mizuki realised she wouldn't come to him and rushed forward and watched in surprise as she managed to spin and sway out of the way of his strikes or redirect them. Three minutes into the spar Hitomi saw her chance when Mizuki over extended himself with a right hand strike. She pushed his arm away, angled towards the floor making him stumble slightly. She curled her hands into fists with the knuckle of the middle fingers raised, and with her left hand, jabbed a point on his shoulder making his entire arm fall limp; she then spun in a clockwise direction so she was behind him facing his back and jabbed a point in his left shoulder blade making his other arm useless as it was frozen in the same position. She kicked the back of his knee-caps causing him to fall on his knees and channelling chakra to her right hand making her nails grow longer and sharper, curled her arm around his neck and pressed them softly into his Adams apple; not enough to hurt or puncture but enough for everyone to know she could kill him if she wanted to.

All of this only took ten seconds and to the rest of the class who weren't able to follow her movements, it seemed she went from avoiding contact, to standing behind him in a position to kill while Mizuki was on his knees frozen in place unable to move his arms. Suddenly, Hitomi removed her arm and jabbed three places on Mizuki's back and two on his neck and his frozen arm fell to his side while the limp one stiffened slightly.

"I'm sorry Mizuki-sensei," Hitomi said as she helped him stand "the tingling should stop soon and you will regain full use of your arms in a few minutes."

"Don't worry about it its fine. I have to say though it was actually quite worrying to be helpless in that position. Remind me never to get you mad at me" he said, voicing what everyone was thinking in their shell-shocked stupor. Hitomi giggled as she walked back to where she was sitting with Ino and Sakura. Her sitting down seemed to snap everyone out of their trance, Ino especially as she started talking rapidly

"Oh my god that was so cool! You'll have to teach me that sometime, but couldn't you have waited until last to show off, now I'm going to look bad because there's no way I'll be able to match that, never mind top it."

Hitomi's match had several different reactions from those who saw it, many of the civilian born were talking about it animatedly, Shino had no visible reaction, Choji had stopped eating and his mouth was open with food halfway in, Kiba was drooling with stars in his eyes and finaly Sasuke was glaring at her thinking, "dammit where did she get such power? I'm an Uchia; I need that power to kill HIM!" (Sorry, I've read this in several fanfics' and I couldn't resist hehe :P)

In the hokage's office, the assembled Jounin, except guy who was quietly mumbling about fires of youth with stars in his eyes, were mostly all silent as they processed what they just saw. Even Kekashi had dropped his porn to the floor unnoticed, with his one eye wide open. Kurenai had seen it though, and with a malicious glint in her eyes, scooped it up while everyone else was distracted.

"Excuse me Hokage-sama," she said, "who is that girl, I can't remember seeing here before." That seemed to wake everyone up as they looked on curiously.

"Hitomi Uzumaki, Kushina's daughter. Apparently after her mother died giving birth to her, a family friend took her on their travels and trained her. She arrived earlier today to become a Shinobi of Konoha." This threw most people for a loop as they didn't even remember seeing Kushina with somebody, never mind pregnant. Kekashi though had a weird glint in his eye as he realised something,

"Hokage-sama is she..."

"Yes Kekashi" the Sandaime said cutting him of as he saw the look in his eye, "however that is a triple-S rank secret as one, I don't know if she knows, and two, we don't need hostile attention coming to her from the other nations." Kekashi simply nodded before looking on the ground for something, then patting his pockets not seeing kurenai's smirk.

Back at the academy training grounds, Iruka was just about to call Ino up when he was interrupted by a scream that resonated throughout the whole village,

"NOOO! Icha-icha, where art thou? Come back to me my love!"

"Damn Kekashi and his porn," Iruka chuckled before raising his voice, "last fight, Ino Yamanaka."

Ino's fight, while not as impressive as Hitomi's as she was unable to get a successful strike in, was still very good as she was one of the few to manage lasting the full five minutes without getting tired and managing to either block or avoid all of Mizuki's hits. As Iruka finished up the scores and took the class to the target practise field, Hitomi walked at the back of the group with Ino giving her tips on her taijutsu and pointing out the different opportunities to strike she had missed. As she watched the other students throw their kunai and shuriken, she noticed a trend going, the civilian born were trying their hardest to score as many points as possible, while the clan and ninja born students tried to score average points, just enough to pass but not enough to give away their true potential. The only one who seemed to break this rule was Sasuke, who tried even harder than the rest to do everything perfectly. It seemed as if he had no notion of subtlety or deception. When it was her turn, she missed the challenging look in Sasuke's eyes as she held the unfamiliar weapons carefully. She slowly threw them one by one, frowning slightly each time she missed. In the end she did poorly with the kunai, only three hitting the target, with none of them hitting the inner circle. She did better with the shuriken though, getting eight on target with five of them in the inner circle. As she made her way back, she smiled upon seeing the worried expression on Ino's face, she was glad they had become such good friends so quickly.

"Hitomi are you alright? What Happened?"

"Calm down Ino. I'm not used to throwing something of that weight and shape so my aim was off. Don't worry though I still made enough points to pass this portion of the test, and the written side doesn't stop me from graduating so even if I fail the Jutsu portion ill still pass."

"That's good. You're too good not to become a Shinobi. You'll have to show me what you do use during lunch though."

"It's nothing special Ino. I just reinforce ordinary playing cards with chakra as I find them more comfortable to hold, but without the chakra they don't exactly fly straight.

Hitomi ended up eating lunch alone with her back resting against a tree as she watched the other academy students. She would have liked to spend it with Ino or Sakura but they shot off the moment lunch started to stalk Sasuke. Right now she was sat in her chair waiting for her turn for the final exam. Most of the students had already been called up but none of them had returned, making her think that they would have left through a back entrance.

"Must be so those who didn't pass don't have to be embarrassed by their follow students."

"Uzumaki, Hitomi." Iruka called as he stuck his head through the door.

As Hitomi walked into the room she saw Iruka and Mizuki sat behind a desk at the back of the room, both with a clipboard and a block of wood in front of them.

"Right, as you know we will be testing you on the **Bunshin, Kawarimi and Henge** Jutsu's. First will be the **Henge, then Kawarimi **and finally **Bunshin.**" Iruka said. "First, Henge into the Sandaime Hokage."

Before Iruka had finished his sentence, Hitomi was covered by a cloud of smoke. It cleared after a few seconds to reveal a perfect copy of the Hokage, but had a little orange book in his hand as an extra.

*Back in the Hokage's office, the Hokage was sweating under the combined glares of the female Jounin, Kurenai being the worst, while Kekashi was staring at him with a love-struck expression on his face*

"Very good Hitomi. The book though, however true it may be, is an unnecessary detail and won't help you on a mission. You next test will be the **Kawarimi** in a combat situation."

As soon as he said this, Mizuki had picked up the block of wood and threw it at her, who made a few hand-seals and just before the block hit her, was once again covered by clouds of smoke. This time however, instead of the Hokage, Sasuke was present with a bump the size of a goose egg growing out the side of his head.

"I said **Kawarimi**, not **Henge**."

"I know" sounded Hitomi's voice from the doorway. As Mizuki and Iruka looked up, they saw Hitomi walk in, grab Sasuke and drag him out then walk back in again. "Sorry about that but he's been getting on my nerves all day. I thought that my shut him up for a bit."

"Well…. You performed it correctly, and it certainly seemed effective." Mizuki said, wondering if it was really a good idea to let her be a Shinobi, "ehh who cares. It's not like it'll affect me anyhow."

"Now your last test, you need to make at least three working clones."

Instead of making the hand-seals, Hitomi bit her thumb and swiped some blood across one of the seals on her belt. Both Chuunin looked on in confusion as a pile of exploding tags appeared on the ground.

"I can't do the regular clone technique. I have too much chakra for it so I've learned a few variants." She explained as she made and held the bird hand-seal. "This one is the **exploding tag clone**. When its hit it will trace the chakra tails of the person and explode upon reaching him." The Chuunin, plus all the Jounin looking through the scrying ball, looked on in interest as the paper tags swirled around making three hollow clones before an illusion settled over them so they looked just like the original.

"Very well, you pass. Pick a forehead protector and come back tomorrow at ten for your team placement."

Hitomi flared her chakra, still holding the bird hand-seal caught the exploding tags as they unravelled and floated towards her hand. She sealed them in her belt, picked up a forehead protector with a black cloth and walked out the door while tying it around her waist above her belt.

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><p>So like it? Please rate and review, even if you think it isn't good. Constructive criticism is welcome but pointless flames and complaints will be ignored and deleted.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

"Underlined" = thoughts

"**Bold"** = Jutsu, summon/demon/feral speak

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any Naruto related material.

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><p>Mizuki was panting with exhaustion as he jumped into the clearing, his pale features framed by the pale moonlight. It was past midnight and he had gone traitor to the hidden leaf twenty minutes ago by stealing the Forbidden Scroll of Seals and he had been running and evading capture since. <span>"Damn ANBU almost got me there. Ehh no matter, this scroll should please my new master greatly."<span>

He stood there hunched over for a few seconds trying to regain his breath before he straightened out. Just as he was about to set off again, he was interrupted by a soft, feminine voice that echoed throughout the clearing

"Good morning mizuki-san."

"Wha? Hitomi! What are you doing here? You should be getting some rest ready for your big day tomorrow" he said, faking a friendly attitude trying to distract her. He looked around nervously, and saw her standing about two metres in front of him, shuffling a deck of cards while three seemed to be floating in front of each other

"You know, when I said I dislike traitors I may have been lying just an incy-wincy bit" she stated, causing mizuki to sigh until he heard her continue that thought, "I absolutely loath them. For the crime of betraying your village and stealing one of its most valuable possessions, surrender now and turn yourself in now or I will incapacitate you!"

It was at this point he noticed her eyes were a metallic grey and the combined effect of her killing intent and glare caused chills to run down his spine, but the difference in height, age and rank caused him to underestimate her.

"Oh really? And what's a little girl like you be able to do? You may have surprised me earlier but I won't hold back this time!" he sneered as he unhooked a demon shuriken from his back, taking care not to shred the forbidden scroll. "Now either turn around and walk away or I'll kill you." "Stupid brat. It's not as if I'll let you live after the humiliation you caused me earlier"

"Really, do you think I'm stupid or are you just that cowardly that you have to wait for a newly graduated Gennin to turn their back before you can defeat them? So what is it Mizuki-Chan?" her voice becoming mocking at the end as she put away her cards.

"That's it you had your chance!" he roared, throwing the chakra enhanced demon shuriken at her. When he saw it pierce her stomach and no sign of a **Kawarimi** being performed, he let a smirk grace his face as he started chuckling. "Should have left when I gave her the chance, maybe then she could have escape... oh shit!"

Mizuki dived to the side as he saw some paper tags flying towards him. As he looked up he saw what was left of Hitomi dissolving into more squares of paper before he was forced to jump away again as the new tags joined the chase. After ten minutes of this game of cat and mouse Mizuki was getting sloppy and after a mistimed dodge, was surrounded by paper tags. Within ten seconds his wrists, ankles, neck and heart were covered by tags and the remaining ones flew back to Hitomi who was holding a half bird hand-seal as she emerged from the treeline behind the spot he originally saw her.

"Are you going to come quietly now? Or do I have to activate the tags?"

"Go ahead and activate them" he sneered, fury evident in his eyes, "the explosion will kill me and badly damage the scroll. Without evidence you'll be charged with murder of a loyal konoha-nin and the destruction of the scroll!"

"Poor stupid, naive Mizuki-Chan" she giggled as she walked towards him, "my **Bunshin** technique is a simple paper clone. The additional affects, such as the exploding, is just a result of the seal I put on them. So if I was to change the seal, to a minor electrical discharge for example, my **Bunshin** technique would go from an exploding clone to a **Raiton release** clone." And with that she formed a half ram hand-seal flared her chakra and smiled in satisfaction as the tags activated, sending small bursts of static electricity into the areas they covered, causing Mizuki to fall face first in front of her with his hair standing up straight and smoking.

Before Hitomi could do anything further, a squad of ANBU appeared in front of her. One of them picked Mizuki up, while two of the remaining three bound him in ninja-wire and picked up the scroll. The last ANBU member, a female who wore a cat mask, stepped forward and placed an arm on Hitomi's shoulder,

"Our thanks Uzumaki-san. You are to come with me as the Hokage wishes to speak to you." And with that they were covered by a swirl of smoke and leaves as they **shunshined** to the hokage's office in the tower.

After the disorientation of traveling so fast wore off and the smoke that accompanied it dissipated, Hitomi saw that some of Konoha's elite Jounin were standing along the side-lines of the room, with the Hokage facing her at the centre of the semi-circle. The ANBU member who accompanied her took a half step forward and got down on one knee bowing.

"Hokage-sama, both the traitor and scroll have been acquired, Boar is taking the scroll back to its pedestal in the Jutsu vault while Tenzo and Lion are taking the traitor, Chuunin Mizuki, to the T.I. department."

"Very good Cat. Why is Uzumaki-san her though?" the Hokage replied, looking curiously at Hitomi who was beginning to fidget with boredom

"Academy graduate Uzumaki-san was waiting in the clearing for the traitor, and was actually the one who intercepted, fought and defeated him." Cat explained

"Very well then, I expect your written report later. Dismissed" and with that the ANBU agent blurred out of existence.

The Hokage turned his attention to Hitomi now, matching the same curious and slightly excited expression that the rest of the Jounin were sending her way while she was taking no notice of them, opting instead to gaze around the room committing the details to memory for the next time she was there.

"Hitomi," the Hokage said, snapping her attention to him, "now while we are thank you for stopping the traitor and recovering the forbidden scroll of seals, I would like you to recount your version of events before I receive the written report as I wish to know how exactly a freshly graduated Gennin was able to defeat an experienced chuunin?" he said, his tone becoming questioning towards the end

"Of course Hokage-sama, but to be honest with you it was mostly luck; most Chuunin, and even an experienced Gennin would most probably be able to defeat me. I was only able to defeat Mizuki because he was already tired, my clone surprised him and because he underestimated me. It also helps that he was rusty as he's spent several years in the academy teaching instead of taking missions and regular training."

"Very well then. Please continue with your report."

With that, Hitomi spent the next few hours recounting her version of events, leaving out the fact that her tarot cards were the reason she knew to be there, then answered the questions that both the Hokage and the surrounding jounin's had. After all the questions had been answered, or in some cases ignored due to their perverse nature or sheer stupidity of the question, the Hokage had dismissed all the Jounin before turning his attention back to Hitomi,

"Now then, a few final things. First of all, I noticed you redirected all the questions that centred on you being there. I am not forcing you to tell me, although I would prefer it if you did, but I would like to know why you didn't answer them. Secondly, while you may refuse if you want to, I wish to know if you would consider putting your **paper clone** techniques into the forbidden scroll of seals and last but not least, both stopping a traitor and recovering such a valuable item is considered as an A-rank mission which you will paid for, and will be put on your record as such."

"Thank you Hokage-sama," she said bowing "your right that I redirected those questions. It's not that I don't want people knowing, I just want it to be a surprise for my Jounin instructor and I wasn't sure if he or she was here or not. As I said in my introduction, I enjoy tarot card reading and over the years I have been able to make accurate predictions. After I passed the test, I did a reading and was told that a traitor would arrive in a clearing to the west after midnight. I dislike traitors and had hoped that I would be able to delay them long enough for ANBU to come and resolve the situation, I was actually surprised that I was able to defeat him!"

"I see. While I'm grateful for your attempt, I am ordering you to come to me next time as I don't wish for you to be hurt which could very well happen if they not as inexperienced, arrogant or rusty as Mizuki was."

"Of course Hokage-sama, I apologise for my lack of thought. As for your second question, I can put the description of my clone technique in the scroll, but the exact method of manipulating paper is a secret I promised my teacher to keep to myself, otherwise I would." Her face becoming apologetic towards the end

"No worries Hitomi-Chan I understand. Now of that's all you can go, I need to sort out the paperwork this incident caused before I can go to sleep" "Kami-dammed paperwork! Why couldn't mizuki wait for morning? I NEED MY BEAUTY-SLEEP!"

"Erm... There is one last thing, a deal of sorts." At her words, the Hokage was instantly on guard, looking for the slightest signs of treason.

"Go on"

"While I don't know it, or even seen it in action, I've heard of a Jutsu local to konoha that has many uses, one of which is a side effect that can help defeat the 'demon paperwork' as I've heard it been referred to"

"Impossible," his face disbelieving, but also slightly hopeful, "if there was such a Jutsu here I would know about it!"

"I assure you sir, while unorthodox, and not its intended purpose, it does help with paperwork."

"I see. Should this Jutsu actually exist and do what you say it does, what is it you would like in return?"

"Nothing much really, but I've had very little training in Genjutsu, and I only know the method of using pain to break one. Hell, half the time I only realise I'm caught in one when it's something outlandish that couldn't possibly happen so I would like a Jounin to give me personal training in Genjutsu for at least three hours a week. Is this acceptable?" Upon deliberating, the Hokage decided that he would probably grant her that if she asked anyway, so nodded his consent prompting her to continue "**Kage-Bunshin**"

"Wha? How does a combat clone help with paperwork?"

"According to the notes I was given, all memories and experience the clone has is returned to the user, so if your clone was to do half the paperwork then dispel, you would have more free time and still know what the clone did." She explained

Rather than answering, the Hokage shot a glare at the Yondaimes smirking portrait followed by a ten minute session of banging his head on the desk, muttering stupid continuously, over a conveniently placed speech bubble graffiti that said

'Bang head here when discovered how to defeat paperwork,

Regards 1st'.

As suddenly as the Hokage started, he stopped banging his head and carried on as if nothing had happened, "Very well, I'll get that sorted for you. If you come back after you've met your Jounin instructor, I'll give you the details then. Dismissed" and with that he created a **kage-bunshin** which started collecting paperwork before jumping out the window behind his desk, laughing manically, scaring the ANBU patrols he passed.

Iruka's eye was twitching as his anger levels rose; He had been trying to gain the classes attention for ten minutes, and they were louder and more destructive than they were yesterday and the class wasn't even half the size! To make matters worse after the two years they had him as their instructor, they had seemed to have gained an immunity to his **'demonic big head'** Jutsu. The only one not causing mayhem was Hitomi, who seemed to be sleeping as she was staring at him, eyes wide with a snot bubble coming out of her nose. He'd have to ask how she did that later. After another ten minutes of trying to get them to pay attention, he decided to put away the kiddy gloves and try something new.

With his hands moving in a blur, he formed several hand-seals before whispering **"Suiton: Daibakufu no Jutsu."** Since the rest of the class were still being rowdy, nobody but Iruka noticed Hitomi stand up and walk behind him as he finished his hand-seals. They noticed though as the noise died of as they saw and heard the build-up of water coming from the sink on Iruka's desk. The whole class froze up momentarily before the silence was broken by Kiba speaking everyone's thoughts,

"Oh shit!" Just as he finished his sentence, the wall of water surged forwards, taking the class with it and slamming them against the wall before exiting the room by means of a pair of conveniently placed drains at the back of the room.

"Now that I've got your attention," Iruka said as he looked at the soaking wet class, some with swirls in their eyes and some with massive bumps on their head, while Hitomi was back in her seat but looking attentive, "today is your first day as official Shinobi of the leaf, you will find many dangers while on mission so train hard and be prepared so you can do your families and your village proud. Now I will assign you to your squad with a Jounin instructor, and no complaints as the Hokage made the teams and their final. Now team one..."

Hitomi zoned out at this point, only paying brief attention when he said her name, along with the Uchiha and Sakura, before daydreaming again. Because of this she failed to notice Iruka leaving the room, Sakura moving to sit next to her or the shadow of the Uchiha that fell across her, and the repeated attempts to get her attention. Finally to pissed off for rational thinking, Sasuke went to punch her in the head, just about to make contact before a blur of movement caused him to over extend himself, making him lose his balance, before tripping and landing on something soft. The whole class, who had been waiting to see what would happen from the start, were shocked when after blinking from Hitomi's **substitution**, found Sasuke to be lying on top of Sakura on the floor, lips connected and his hand on her chest, and his crotch trapping her hand. Faster than the eye could see, Sasuke was on the other side of the room hastily wiping his mouth while Sakura, who had a dazed expression, was mumbling quietly, though it was loud enough for everyone in the silent room to here.

"What the hell? ...too rough... Bad kisser...tiny dick, three balls?" As soon as she said the last part she started heaving and puking her guts out while the rest of the class started laughing, with the remains of Sasuke's fan club wearing disgusted expressions. By the week was done, the Uchiha's reputation had become non-existent and women of all ages and looks began avoiding him like the plague.

While all this was going on, Hitomi was kneeling next to Sakura, holding her hair and rubbing her back.

"Thanks Hitomi." Sakura said "god I can't believe I liked him, the bastard even slipped some tongue!"

"No worries and I kinda feel guilty. If I hadn't swapped with the book you wouldn't have had to go through that"

"I'm actually glad you did, thank god I realised the real him before something happened cause of my crush on him."

Twenty minutes later, having recovered from her previous ordeal, Sakura was reading a book next to Hitomi and stoking her hair as she had fallen asleep next to her, and had slipped onto her lap. Sasuke, however was at the from brooding while imaging the look of utter defeat on Itachi's face as all his techniques failed against Sasuke's fireballs. Two hours later, Sakura had fallen asleep as well, and was now lying next to Hitomi with both of them holding each other, and Hitomi snuggled into Sakura with her head resting on Sakura's shoulder, while Sasuke had gone from emo brooding to grinning like psychopath, with the odd insane chuckle. Unknown to the three, their Jounin instructor, Hatake Kakashi, who had walked in, took one look at them before being blown back, blood streaming out of his nose as he saw Sakura's and Hitomi's position. It took him a few minutes to recover, but once he had he cleaned up then walked back into the room, gaining Sasuke's attention this time,

"Right, meet me up on the roof; if you're not there in ten minutes I'll be sending you back to the academy."

Without looking back or waiting for his teammates, Sasuke got up and rushed out the door. As soon as Kakashi was sure there was no one else around, he got out a camera and took a couple of pictures of his female Gennin, "hehe blackmail!"

The camera flash served the purpose of waking the two girls and after a couple of seconds blinking blearily trying to get their bearings, blushed violently after realising the position they were in and faster than Kakashi could blink, they had jumped several metres apart, eyes wondering about, only for them to blush and re-avert their eyes every time they made eye contact.

"Now, if you're quite finished," Kakashi said gaining their attention and breaking them out of their stupor, "meet me and your third teammate on the roof so we can start our team introduction and get to know one another." And with that disappeared in a cloud of smoke as he shunshined away. Sakura made to walk out the room and up the stairs but was stopped by Hitomi holding onto her shoulder. Fighting back a blush at the contact, she glanced sideways questioningly at Hitomi, who was holding a half ram hand-seal, before they both burst into thin strips of blank paper which then flew out of an open window, then up towards the roof.

On the roof, Sasuke's frown at seeing Kakashi use a shunshin, became an outright glare as the paper strips meshed together revealing Sakura, who stumbled as she was released and Hitomi.

"Well then, now we're all here why don't you introduce yourselves"

"Like how sensei?" Sakura asked

"Well I'll go first and you can follow my example. My name is Hatake Kakashi, my likes; well you're too young for that. My dislikes... Well I have hobbies and dreams," he finished lamely, "now you, paper girl your up."

"Paper girl, honestly is that the best you could come up with?" Hitomi asked incredibly, "well, my name is Hatake Kakashi, my likes; well you're too young for that. My dislikes... Well I have hobbies and dreams," she said in a crappy sarcastic imitation of Kakashi's voice

"Ha-ha funny. Now do it properly"

"Fine, fine. My names Uzumaki Hitomi, I like my friends, vixens and something special. You have to find it out yourself. I absolutely loath traitors and arrogant assholes who think their better than others due to their families and ancestors merits and achievements," She gained an eye-smile from Kakashi at that while Sasuke glared at her even harder, "my hobbies include learning more and creating more of my Origami techniques and developing new and more advanced seals. My only real dream at the moment is to remind the world of my clan's greatness and ensure its continuation, hopefully as part of konoha."

Hmm interesting. Considering her parents I'm not too surprised by the sealing. I wonder where she learned Origami Jutsu from though."

"Hold on," Sakura said, "why didn't you say all that yesterday when you first introduced yourself?"

"Simple, should we ever compete in the chuunin exams, I'd rather them not know all my secrets."

"Well then" Kakashi said, regaining their attention, "pinkie your up. And please don't follow my example to the letter as well" glaring at Hitomi as he said it

"Right, well my name's Haruno Sakura, my likes include my family, friends and other things, I dislike tomatoes. My dream is to become a successful medic-nin"

"Huh, her file made her out to be a fan girl. I wonder what happened" "very good. Now you, the brooding emo"

Sasuke showed no visible reaction to this apart from the tightening of his lips. Internally, however, he was cursing up a storm promising retribution, "my names **Uchiha** Sasuke," he said arrogantly, putting emphasis on his family name, causing the other three to frown, "I don't have any likes and too many dislikes to mention, the worst being fan-girls. And I don't have a dream, but my ambition is to kill a certain man then revive my clan." Throughout his speech, his voice held the same monotone, except when he said his name and the hate that slipped in when mentioning 'a certain man'

"I'm sorry, but how can you revive your clan if they've been dead for several years?" Hitomi questioned, making Sasuke glare at her, "it sounds like your living in the past rather than the present. Plus shouldn't you focus on repopulating your clan rather than on revenge?"

Sasuke opened his mouth to answer but Kakashi, seeing how he was gritting his teeth and glaring daggers at Hitomi, intervened hoping to prevent an argument, "well then, we'll start our first assignment tomorrow."

"What kind of assignment Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura asked, also seeing the potential blow up

"Survival training." He said with an eye-smile

"WHAT!" Sasuke shouted, "This is an outrage! We did this in the academy, why are you making an elite clan member such as me do this when it's these two losers who need to redo it!" Sasuke's rant caused Sakura to tear up and begin to doubt her abilities, "am I really that useless?"

Seeing this, Hitomi wrapped Sakura in a hug and placed secures head on her shoulder, where Sakura tried to hide her teary eyes as Hitomi glared at Sasuke.

"Don't be so quick to judge Uchiha," Kakashi spat out, "my survival training is nothing like what they put you through in the academy. In fact, my little test is what's going to determine whether you actually become Gennin or not"

"Wh-what? I thought we passed already," Sakura mumbled from her position on Hitomi's shoulder.

"Oh no, the academy test was just to see if you had the **potential** to become Gennin. It's up to me whether you pass or not, hehe I should warn you, this test has a 66.6% failure rate. Out of your entire graduation class, only nine of you will actually make Gennin." As he looked round, he saw that Sakura and Hitomi had slightly fearful, but determined faces, whereas Sasuke still had his arrogant brooding face on, as if he thought the world would end before he failed.

"You're enjoying this aren't you" Hitomi said breaking him out of his musing

"Of course I am. I get to torture little Gennins without punishment or having to use the excuse of training." As he said this, his little eye-smile became an outright smirk which could be seen clearly despite his mask covering it. "Now, we will meet at training ground seven tomorrow at seven am, don't be late and try not to eat anything. With the workout I'm putting you through you'll just end up puking. Sasuke you're dismissed, Sakura, Hitomi stay behind for a few moments. I need to speak about your academy records."

"Hmph, losers got a low score" Sasuke muttered as he got up and walked back into the academy.

Kakashi waited until he couldn't feel Sasuke's chakra signature, before focusing on his other maybe-students, "Sakura cheer up. Just because your physical abilities are low, the fact you passed the academy means you are skilled enough to be Gennin and your attitude shows you're willing to improve. Besides there are lots of sects of the Shinobi core that don't require high amounts of physical activities. Now, your file makes you out to be a die-hard fan-girl pinning after Sasuke. What exactly happened?" At this she turned green while Hitomi burst out laughing, confusing Kakashi,

"Ha-ha, Sakura got some, hehe, first hand experience that Sasuke isn't all that! In fact, I think her discovery turned all his fan girls off him and destroyed the reputation of the Uchiha clan for ever.

"Okay then... Hitomi, first of all the Hokage wishes to know if you are aware of your parent's identities." At her nod he sighed in relief before continuing, "That's good. Now do you want their legacies, and do you want him to make an announcement to the village?"

"I would like the have their legacies," she replied," but I would rather keep my dad's identity a secret unless I think they deserve to know and won't abuse my trust."

All through this, Sakura was confused and wanted to know more but respected Hitomi's wish for privacy, I just hope I will prove to be a trustworthy enough friend to be told"

"That's all well and good but there are some who knew of your parent's marriage, and will connect the dots. The Hokage will make it an S-class secret so it will be easy to tell who spilt the beans if it somehow gets out. Also, where did you learn Origami Jutsu? As far as I know the only clan who learnt it had died of before the hidden villages were developed."

"My uncle on my mums side, god knows how distant, girlfriend stumbled on their clan grounds which had a perfectly preserved and previously untouched library. She learnt everything from scrolls there and taught me when I went to visit them for a year."

"I see. Well that was everything I needed. Same time and place tomorrow as Sasuke." And with that Kakashi was hidden by a swirl of smoke and leaves as he disappeared in a shunshin. Sakura got up and was about to leave when Hitomi grabbed her hand and pulled her down to a sitting position. Ignoring Sakura's protests, she unsealed her tarot cards before shuffling them. "Sakura, locking at the sky Kakashi either came really late or he took his time waking us up. Plus he looked too happy than should be normal when he told us the details of the meeting and test." As she was saying that, she had dealt six cards and had started to study them. After a minute, she sighed and said, "I knew it. He's going to be late again tomorrow, so I would suggest you don't get up to early. Also the thing about puking if we eat is a lie."

"Thanks. I was starting to worry; well I'll see you tomorrow at nine?"

"Yeah I'll see you then." And with that Sakura walked back into the academy while Hitomi dissolved back into paper strips, which then flew off in the direction of the Hokage tower.

Unknown to the two of them, Kakashi was hidden on top of the building opposite as he was curious about how his maybe-students would act without him there, "interesting. At least they'll work together fine and if all else fails, I'll do a joint apprenticeship with Anko. Although, that seer ability of hers may cause more problems for my test tomorrow. I'll have to find a way to temporally neutralise it." And with that jumped down to street level and walked off, all the while his nose was stuck in the Icha-icha book he was reading.

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><p>Sorry about the delay in updating but it's here now. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and added this to their favouratealert list.

**Rianne Black** - Thanks for the spelling corrections  
><strong>Tachi Kagahara<strong> - So far I havnt got a definate pairing suggestions would be nice  
><strong>Cocoalover1956 - <strong>Thanks for the advice, but while the bra size may be unrealistic it doesn't mean its impossible. Also this is fanfiction and I really dislike some parts of cannon so you will find some out of character attitudes and actions, but saying that I didn't mean for it to sound like they had fallen in love with her. Finally, if you think back to cannon, the untrained idiot Naruto was able to beat Mizuki because one: Naruto was underestimated and two: Naruto used a a Jutsu that surprised him. Mizuki would definitely underestimate a female acedamy student he had never seen before since the majority are fan girls. Add that to the fact her taijutsu style is similar to the Hyūga's Gentle Fist in the sense that a single direct hit can be deadly or incapacatating, it's really not that unrealistic that she was able to beat him.

Please rate and review, even if you think it isn't good. Constructive criticism is welcome and encouraged, but pointless flames and complaints will be ignored and deleted.


	3. Chapter 3

"Underlined" = thoughts

"**Bold"** = Jutsu, summon/demon/feral speak

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any Naruto related material.

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><p>Sasuke was pissed. No, forget that; he had passed being pissed long ago. Hell, he couldn't describe his feelings right now even if he had rational thought processes. It all started yesterday after he was dismissed from meeting his sensei. He had thought that even though he didn't need to try to pass the test, it would earn him bonus points if he impressed his sensei; so with those thoughts he had lost himself in his training with only an apple for tea. He finally dropped unconscious around one am, and was woken up by those dam birds with their incessant chatter. It took him ten minutes of lying there before he realised he had a test, and by that time it was close to the meeting time. With no time for a shower or any other hygiene practices, he rushed to training ground seven, getting dressed on the journey and was sweaty, tired, hungry and looking a mess. No matter how tired he was, his Uchiha pride wouldn't let him sleep in case he missed his sensei's arrival.<p>

That was two hours ago and his stomach was driving him crazy while the heat and sun was making him sweat buckets, adding to the smell on his body and clothes from last night's activities. When Hitomi and Sakura arrived, he ignored their presence as normal, but seeing their disgusted faces as they smelt him and ran away, he sported a maniacal grin as ideas came to him, "if the smell puts of even my most persistent fan girl, the rest should be easier to deflect." Thankfully for the citizens of Konoha, especially the Inuzuka with their sensitive noses and Aburame with their Kikaichū, this was just the crazy speaking and come tomorrow; Sasuke would be in a better state of mind and squeaky clean.

While Sasuke mused, sat against the middle of three stumps in the clearing, the other two were lying next to some trees, cuddling each other like yesterday, though only Hitomi was asleep this time. Sakura was stroking Hitomi's hair while thinking about what area of ninja she should focus on, and whether Hitomi would help her with her Taijutsu. Another half an hour later, Kakashi appeared in a puff of smoke, causing Sakura to sit up and giggle at Hitomi's mumbles and searching hands.

"Come on Hitomi-Chan" Sakura whispered as she shook her shoulders, "wakey-wakey, Kakashi-sensei's here"

Hitomi groaned as she sat up, her eyes still closed as she leaned back against a tree. She opened her eyes as Kakashi started talking, but unnoticed to her teammates; her body became rigid and tense while her eyes had unfocussed.

"That ought to stop her figuring out the meaning of my test. It will also prove my theory of whether Sakura is willing to help her or not" Kakashi thought, "now that we're all here and awake, we can start," he announced as he placed an alarm down professionally ignoring Sasuke's unkempt look, his awful smell and the half-crazed glint in his eyes. "This alarm is set for noon. By that time you must have retrieved a bell from me," he pulled two bells from his pouch, "if come noon you don't have a bell, you will be tied to one of those stumps while me and those who gained a bell will eat lunch in front of you before I fail you and send you back to the academy." He looked on in amusement as Sasuke's belly growled, while Sakura simply smiled. Hitomi still had her glazed look.

"But sensei, there's only two bells" Sakura stated

"Ahh yes, I'm glad you caught that. That's just incentive to make you try your hardest as at least one of you will fail. Now, you may use your shuriken and kunai, and I expect you to come at me with the intent to kill or you have no chance. Now begin."

Instantly, two blurs shot off, while Hitomi in her dazed state just sat there. It was only after they had hidden themselves that Sasuke and Sakura had noticed that there was something wrong with Hitomi as she sat there. While Sasuke seemed unbothered by it, Sakura was worried for her new friend and was thinking of ways to help her.

Sasuke, getting tired of waiting, took out a couple of kunai and threw them before rushing out of his hiding place, performing a flying kick at Kakashi who had side-stepped to avoid the kunai. As the kick came close, Kakashi grabbed Sasuke's leg and pushed him back, causing Sasuke to stumble before crashing to the ground. As he slowly got up, Sasuke's superior smirk came back full blast as he started to boast, "Give it up. First I'm going to defeat you then learn everything you know before killing 'him'"

"Hmm are you now. And what about your comrades?"

"Hmph what about them, I'm different from those losers."

"Maybe, but from what I can see, only on your views about personal hygiene. Very well then" he sighed, "lesson, Taijutsu." Reaching into his pouch with a bored look, he felt satisfaction as he saw Sasuke tense up, "this will be amusing."

"What's he doing, kunai?" Sasuke thought. When Kakashi finally removed his hand from the pouch on his leg, Sasuke slammed face first on the floor as he saw Kakashi raise an orange book and start to read it. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT FOR!" He screamed as he shot up

"Why to find out what happens next of course. Don't worry, this won't affect our fight; in fact it's probably still not a big enough handicap to help you win." With an enraged roar, Sasuke rushed in, all pre-planning and training forgotten as mind screamed to pound the grey haired annoyance into the ground.

Meanwhile, when Sakura saw Sasuke jump out from his hiding place she immediately took action, "this is my chance." Ignoring Sasuke's and Kakashi's fight, she rushed to Hitomi's side before shaking her gently trying to snap her out of whatever was happening to her. Seeing that it wasn't working, she put her left and right hands over Hitomi's heart and sternum. With a whispered "Kai", she sent a pulse of chakra through her hands to disrupt Hitomi's chakra, hoping it was just a mild Genjutsu affecting her. Getting desperate with another failure, she did a full body check on Hitomi. Hearing a noise behind her, she looked around in panic but sighed in in relief when she saw that Sasuke and Kakashi were still fighting. Not paying any attention to the two of them, she pulled Hitomi forward and finally found a senbon needle that was causing Hitomi's condition lodged in her back. She had just pulled it out, sighing relief as Hitomi's body relaxed when she heard a cold, hard voice behind her that sent chills running down her spine and filled her with dread.

"Just what do you think you are doing?"

Gulping, she turned around to find her sensei glaring at her while behind him; Sasuke was tied up unconscious, face and knees on the ground with his ass sticking up in the air pointing at them and he looked badly banged up, especially with a weird finger-shaped hole in his trousers that was located dead centre of his ass. She was about to stammer a reply, but was distracted by a tingling feeling that felt eerily familiar. Before she could think about it further, she felt herself disintegrate and fly away. Kakashi, seeing Hitomi take Sakura with her in her **paper Shunshin** despite still feeling the effects of the paralysing nerve cluster being assaulted, eye-smiled before leisurely walking towards them with a jaunty whistle, not even looking at Sasuke, who had just woken up and was now attempting to get up, all the while wearing a dazed expression.

The sun was glaring overhead at the group of four, all with scuffs, torn clothes and dirt. Sasuke was tied up to the stump he was sat at earlier, while the two girls were sat together; Sakura, with a crestfallen expression, was in between Hitomi's legs while Hitomi had her hands around Sakura's waist and holding her hands while resting her head on Sakura's shoulder. Kakashi was standing before them lost in thought, two bells still dangling at his side. Kakashi showed no emotion as he looked upon his Gennin hopefuls. Hitomi had a sad yet determined expression; Sakura hadn't changed while Sasuke looked enraged yet arrogant. It wasn't hard to guess their thought processes, the girls sad at failing, but Hitomi was accepting it and was determined to do better next year while Sasuke was angry about being tied up but still thinking he was going to pass.

Sighing, Kakashi finally spoke up, "I guess I underestimated the difficulty of my test. Therefore after this, I will explain a new test and give you girls and guy another chance." He paused here as he took in their facial expressions, the girls turned hopeful and determined. Sasuke had lost the enraged look, but instead looked smug and confident while looking just as, if not more, arrogant than before. "Sakura, Hitomi you two may eat lunch, however you are not to give Sasuke any! Should you do that then you all will fail and dropped from the Shinobi core permanently. Now I have some things to take care of at the Hokage tower so I will be back in half an hour." With that he disappeared in a **Konoha Shunshin**.

While Sasuke tried to ignore his painfully hungry stomach, the other two were happily eating before they were disturbed by Sasuke's stomach growling. Sighing, Hitomi brought her chopsticks up to Sasuke's mouth telling him to open up, before he turned his head away and with a diagonal swish, head-butted the chopsticks out of her hands and onto the floor, scattering the food they held.

"Hey! That was a waste you ungrateful bastard."

"Hmph, it's your own fault. Didn't you here Kakashi's orders? He said I'm not allowed to eat. Besides I'm not like you losers, I can go a few days without food and still kick his ass."

Sakura was about to speak up, but was prevented from doing so when a shuriken went whizzing past her head before cutting the ropes that held Sasuke.

"That's enough you three," Kakashi said in a disappointed tone as he appeared in front of them, "you're all dismissed, a messenger will contact you in a few days with your results."

He watched on sadly as Sasuke walked off without a care in the world while Sakura wrapped her arms around herself looking upset and disappointed in herself, Hitomi was holding her while alternating between glaring at Sasuke and whispering comforting words in her ear.

"Don't worry you two," he said gaining their attention, "no matter what you two will still pass, whether on a team or as part of an apprenticeship."

He **Shunshined** off then, relieved at their happy faces. Sakura was jumping up in down in celebration while Hitomi chuckling in amusement watching her, "come on Sakura, why don't we relax in the hot springs in celebration, my treat." The whole of fire country could claim they were temporally deafened with the ensuing squeal of happiness.

Later that night, a meeting room in the Hokage tower was filled to the brim with all the Jounin and certain Chuunin, the potential instructors lined up at the front facing the Hokage,

"Team 1 failed"

"Team 2 failed"

"Team 3 failed" and on it went, Jounin instructors reporting the Gennins failures until finally,

"Team 8, passed but requires some mental conditioning before I can take them on missions" Kurenai said, looking pleased

"Team 10 passed, they already have excellent teamwork but need motivation to train" Asuma said, puffing on an almost dead cigarette

The Sandaime puffed on his pipe a few timed before speaking up, "well then since Kakashi won't be turning up any time soon, why don't…" whatever he had been about to say, was interrupted by a figure stood on the left of Kurenai, who despite being there from the start hadn't been noticed until now.

"hem-hem" the figure cleared its throat, gaining everyone's attention. As one, the entire room snapped their heads to the figure, only to be shocked when they realised it was Kakashi _on time_. After a few seconds the room was filled by the repeated cries of "Kai" by everyone who wasn't stunned stupid. Sweat-dropping and a mumble of "what?" he turned to face the Hokage and ignored everyone else as he waited for them to stop.

Five minutes later, everyone had calmed down and got over their surprise.

"Well then Kakashi, your report?" the Hokage asked, interested in Kakashi's decision about his three Gennins; the last Uchiha, his sensei's daughter and a clone, personality and ability wise anyway, of his dead teammate Rin.

"Erm," Kakashi stalled, "how do I say it right to convince him to go along with my idea? Wait, that's it!" "Actually Hokage-Sama, despite traditions, does the team have to consist of three Gennins?"

Sarutobi sighed, disappointment clearly evident, "you know why the teams are made up of one Jounin and three Gennins Kakashi, don't make me lecture you on this."

"Very well then, I Hatake Kakashi do hereby request under section five, mandate fourteen of the Konoha Shinobi Charter that I be allowed to take on apprentices." The room was rendered speechless by this. A master-apprentice was rare in the Shinobi core and the last recorded example in the five major hidden villages was Anko and her teacher, the traitorous Sannin Orochimaru. It had fallen out of favour in Konoha since then. A couple of those present, such as the Hokage and Shikaku Nara, were interested at the way Kakashi worded his request. The exact wording and his earlier question about the number of members in a team lead them to think he wanted to get rid of only one, as it seemed he felt the other two had potential. Slowly but surely, the rest of the room caught up to the Hokage's thoughts as he deliberated on what to do next, the one thing similar in the thoughts of those present was the thought that one of those that Kakashi wanted to keep had to be Uchiha Sasuke, due to Kakashi's almost legendary guilt and self-inflicted debt to his deceased teammate Obito.

Finaly, the Hokage decided on what he thought to be the best way to move forward, "very well then Kakashi, why don't you tell us your observations of the three and we'll go from there."

Kakashi remained quiet for a minute, gathering his thoughts before speaking up, "very well then, starting with Hitomi Uzumaki. First her Taijutsu; I have found that while it is impressive and full of potential, is actually easy to beat. I would compare it most with the Hyuuga's Juuken, but while the Juuken targets the chakra pathways and Tenketsu points, Hitomi's style targets virtually every other weak spot, such as nerve clusters, pressure points, acupuncture points, tensed muscles and even joints, she will also make changes to her fist shape and channel chakra through her hands and fingers as the target requires. For this style to work, speed; accuracy and chakra control is needed. The reason her style is easy to beat is because while she has completely mastered the accuracy and chakra control aspects, she needs to work on her speed as apart from those she catches off guard, anyone faster than her, which should be all Chuunin and above, will be able to evade her attacks and hit her.

Secondly, her **origami** style Jutsu; while exciting and new, she seems to be limited to only two Jutsu, her **Shunshin** and clone, which when hit allows her to use the seek and capture trail.

Her real talent however, is in Fuinjutsu which isn't surprising seeing as her mother and the Uzumaki clan in general were considered the top Fuinjutsu experts in the elemental nations. The one seal array I saw her draw, she drew on trees and the floor while in the middle of co-ordinating with her team-mate Sakura to fight me and draw me into the centre of her developing trap. When it activated, it absorbed and converted the surrounding natural chakra in to chakra chains, much like her mother's, which then every seal, connecting to all other seals effectively creating a cage of interlocking chains. Upon seeing the capture of my **Kage-Bunshin** the chains retracted, making the cage smaller and tighter until finally it dispelled my clone. I later learned that Hitomi thought that seal array up on the spot and included a secondary surprise in the fact the chains will leach chakra from the prisoner upon making physical contact.

Finally, she seems to be a pleasant young woman, willing to work and help others and she and Sakura seemed to have formed a very close bond already, much like sisters."

Everyone was completely absorbed by his report, all realising the potential Hitomi seemed to have. The Hokage took a few minutes to fully take it all in before smiling and nodding at Kakashi to continue.

"next is Sakura Haruno, the academy records make her out to be a die-hard Sasuke fan-girl with little stamina, strength and Taijutsu while having a small chakra pool but excellent control over it, no mention whatsoever about Jutsu preferences other than she passed the three exam Jutsu and no ambitions as a ninja other than to marry Sasuke. Upon meeting her, I found that she isn't a fan-girl at all and seemed to dislike Sasuke. Earlier on when I proceeded with the test she defied the academy records even further by showing she actually has decent stamina, a good grasp on the academy Taijutsu with a decent amount of force behind her hits and most importantly, she has the right mentality to be a Kunoichi. While fighting her I noticed that the records were right about her chakra pool/control and she was especially good with the **clone **Jutsu."

At this point, many of the Jounin had become confused as they expected one of the two Kunoichi to receive a bad report but the way things were going, it would be the Uchiha which was incomprehensible to them when they thought about Kakashi's views on the Uchiha clan, not to mention the glowing praises in the academy reports. When the silence wasn't interrupted, Kakashi took a deep breath before continuing, his eye, the visible one that is, going sombre,

"Finally, we have Sasuke Uchiha. First of all, before I continue with my report I want to know how he passed the psyche test upon entering the academy. The brat is self-centred, unable to work with anyone, conceited, arrogant without the skills to back it up and hell-bent on revenge. In the introductory meeting he claimed to have no likes, many dislikes and hates and he puts revenge above starting a family which leads me to think he is a flight risk, and a major one at that. Next, when I arrived at training ground seven this morning, he was unwashed, sweaty, red eyed with a manic gleam and clear evidence he hadn't been to sleep since I saw him yesterday. He then proved his academy records wrong completely; when he hid he was half sticking out of a bush on the edge of clearing, he has no patience and rushed out to attack me after just two minutes, let his rage take over when I pulled my book out and didn't show any sort of planning or technique while trying to hit me. After the test had concluded, he was the one tied up yet he still thought it was the other two that would be punished and dropped due to lack of skill and when both Hitomi and Sakura tried to give him food as a show of comradeship he refused and even nocked the chopsticks out of Hitomi's hand." At this stage, the entire room had gone slack-jawed and surprisingly enough, none of it was caused by the fact that Kakashi had bad things to say about ANY Uchiha member. Not, their dumfounded expressions was about the fact that someone so obviously bad made it that far in the academy, even getting rookie of the year position.

Finaly the silence was broken, again by the Hokage, as he voiced everyone's', or at least everyone who had gotten over their shock, thought process, "very well then Kakashi, what is your recommendation for the three?"

"hmm," Kakashi thought, tapping his chin, "Hitomi and Sakura together as a team would make the perfect infiltration-seduction," here he blushed and giggled slightly thinking back on their 'together moments' earning him glares from the females in the room, "reconnaissance-interrogation-assignation team, with Sakura learning some medic Jutsu as well so my recommendation for them is an apprenticeship with me and Anko, with various Jounin teaching them bits and pieces on the side. For the Uchiha, I recommend genetic samples be taken, along with sperm samples to impregnate willing Kunoichi despite your stance on it Hokage-Sama I honestly believe the Uchiha clan won't recover without such drastic measure. After that I believe he should either gets euthanized or sealed so completely that he is in a vegetative state with no hope of recovering. Failing that I would recommend you still take the genetic and sperm samples, then put a multitude of loyalty and perimeter seals on him like the caged bird seal so he'll be for ever loyal to Konoha and should he ever break the loyalty seal, or get kidnapped and goes a certain distance away from Konoha or other Konoha Shinobi without permission then the seal wipe all genetic coding from his body, killing him and removing the risk of others stealing the Sharingan."

The Hokage took several poofs on his unlit pipe before sighing, "I'll trust your judgement on this Kakashi. The civilian council will never hear for his death so it will have to be the second option with the Uchiha still part of team seven but with the girls getting extra training from various teachers while you try to polish his skills. Unfortunately the level of seals you're talking about is fairly complex and Jiraiya isn't expected back for a few months yet so that idea will have to wait."

"Hokage-Sama, you're forgetting Hitomi. After the seal I saw her create today _**'on the spot'**_ I believe that will be easy for her. Hell, if she's as far into the study of seals as I think she is, she might be better than Minato-Sensei, and half of his knowledge came from the Uzumaki Clan "

"Hmm. Very well then we'll go with that route. Kakashi, tell her I would like to speak to her at her earliest convenience, she is currently residing at Shinobi Complex B, flat number 314. The rest of you, this will be considered an SS ranked secret. I would like for all of you to watch for signs of him resisting the seals, or broke free of them whenever you are around him. Now everyone, you are to carry on with your normal duties. Dismissed." The entire room was a blur as all the Jounin rushed out while the Hokage simply relit his pipe, having already created a seal-less **Kage-Bunshin** to sort out the necessary paperwork caused by this little episode while he got out a little orange book from a secret drawer and started giggling to himself.

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><p>Sorry about the delay in updating but it's here now. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and added this story to their favouratealert list.

**Wrin:** Thanks and yes, Hitomi has been in contact with Akatsuki though as for how is a surprise for now  
><strong>Tachi Kagahara:<strong> Akatsuki might still be evil, as evil as misguided puppets can be anyway, and just not know the particulars of her birth... one thing i will say is that they're still going for world domination. Also good idea about the friendship thing and i'll definatly use it as for Zabusa, i have plans for him first hehe.


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry for the delay but it's here now, anyone waiting for my next chepter of 'Blood Magic and Runes' may be in for a bit more of a wait as iv'e written half the chapter but lost my notes for the rest of it. I should have finished by Friday 3rd Feb though.

"Underlined" = thoughts

"**Bold"** = Jutsu, summon/demon/feral speak

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any Naruto related material.

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><p>Hitomi fidgeted nervously as she stood in the middle of a council room in the Hokage tower. She was surrounded on both sides by the heads of the various clans in residing in Konoha; well those that had sufficient numbers andor a clan head meaning the Uchiha, Senju and Kurama clans were absent. Sat in front of her were those who perhaps are even more worrying; the Hokage, his two teammates turned advisors Homura Mitokado and Koharu Utatane, his war advisor and the head of the ANBU branch 'Root' Danzo Himura and finally the ANBU high commander, masked as always, known only as 'Dragon'. Hitomi was nervous, very nervous; she had been led here five minutes ago with no reason given for her presence and so far, no one had spoken yet and all the important and powerful people that were sat around her had been content to simply sit there and observe her.

It all started this morning with her visit from Kakashi, her now official squad leader. It had been four days since the disaster of their test and as promised, he had given her the final decision about their squad. The news she had received was exciting, yet also very confusing with a dash of worry. Both Sakura and her had passed, which wasn't surprising as Kakashi had all but swore in blood upon it; no the confusing part was that despite his bad performance and Kakashi's obvious reluctance to do so, Sasuke had also passed with them. Upon seeing her confused face he chuckled before reassuring that the Hokage had a plan to deal with it and if successful, would mean Sasuke wouldn't be a problem.

That wasn't so bad but what he said next was a thousand times worse than any bad situation she could think of. Kakashi's parting comment had been that she had been requested by the Hokage of all people for a meeting at 10:00 and upon checking his watch said, "I guess I got lost on the road of life, but if you hurry you won't be too late I suppose" and with that he disappeared before she could wrap her head around it. Checking her watch herself, she paled as she saw it was 12:20 and she was on the opposite end of Konoha to the Hokage tower. Panicking, she activated her unique **Shunshin**, cursing Kakashi has she sped to the tower.

Even more nervous than before, Hitomi cleared her throat before speaking up,

"Err, excuse me for my lateness, Kakashi-san claimed to have gotten lost on 'the road of life' and I was only informed of the meeting a few minutes ago."

The Hokage smiled gently at her for that, reassuring her and relieving a lot of the tension she had been feeling. "Not to worry Hitomi-chan. We had anticipated this situation happening and had actually scheduled the meeting for 12:30. Had you not have arrived when you did I would have dispatched an ANBU to inform and collect you, though I must say, it's quite an impressive feat to be able to travel the distance you did in such a short time. Now there are several reasons for you being here but before we get to that, Kakashi described the seal array you used during his test and informed me that you thought of it on the spot." seeing her nod many of those in attendance, all of which had already been told the details of Kakashi's report, had shocked faces. The only ones who didn't were the Hokage, who was smiling and Danzo and Hiashi Hyuuga who both wore calm expressions to mask their emotions. Hiashi however, had a calculation gleam to his eyes and began looking at her closer, suspicions of her parentage forming.

"Excellent," the Hokage continued, "would you mind explaining how proficient you are in the sealing arts, and roughly how you think you compare to seal masters we know of such as the Yondaime or Jiraiya of the Sannin."

Hitomi stood silently, contemplating for a few moments before speaking, "well I passed my stage nine test a month before my grand-dad passed away, and I am roughly at level four of stage ten." Before she carry on she was interrupted by Danzo who had vocalized the thoughts running through the minds of most of the rooms occupants, including the Hokage,

"Stage, level? I assume they're Uzumaki labels so would you mind explaining what they stand for?"

"Of course, my apologies. Stages one to six are just different complexities of seal arrays, such as beginner, intermediate seals and the levels go from one to ten and are the difficulties within those stages. Stages seven and eight deal with time/space manipulation seals and to pass stage eight, level ten one must make a time/space Ninjutsu that combines both seals and hand-seals and must be combat effective, such as the Yondaimes Hiraishin Jutsu. Stage nine is the making of seals with other water based substances, such as blood and how the different substances affect the results of the different seal arrays. The tenth and final stage is the use of combat seal arrays using just your chakra and no solid surface to write it on." Her explanation had shocked the entire room and it took a few minutes before they could speak.

Finally the silence was broken by the Hokage by his question of, "And would mind explaining some of the different results a different substance would produce?"

"Of course, using blood as an example; for a normal seal array such as an exploding tag, sealing scroll or security seal; writing it in blood won't actually make any difference, apart from the colour being red rather than black. The only seals that work better with blood are seal arrays written on and designed to affect the body in some way, such as enhancing, mind control etc. Now if there is no more questions...," seeing none she carried on, "the Yondaime, due to his Hiraishin Jutsu would have completed stages seven and eight but without seeing his work I wouldn't know for sure but I assume he had completed the earlier stages as well, Jiraiya I would say would be working on stage seven if he is still working on improving his skills in Fuinjutsu."

The room was silent while they contemplated this, a few members of the council openly smiling/smirking at the realization of what her skills in Fuinjutsu could provide.

"That is rather fortunate Hitomi-chan. We have been made aware of a certain situation that required the help of a skilled Fuinjutsu master but unfortunately, the only other allied person that we knew of that is skilled in Fuinjutsu is Jiraiya of the Sannin but he isn't expected to return for several months yet." The Hokage said with a slightly cheerful smile before his face and voice turned grave, "the problem is that we have recently found that the academy has been fabricating reports for certain students on the orders of the civilian council. While that part doesn't concern you directly, the effects of it does; amongst other things that have been embellished, your team-mate Uchiha Sasuke in particular as his psyche-analysis was completely disregarded and they simply made something up without even testing him. After Kakashi's report a few days ago, a course of action was decided that while extreme and harsh, was deemed necessary the prevent the Uchiha clan, the Sharingan in particular, from abandoning Konoha and even falling into that hands of one of our enemies or dying out completely."

Hitomi looked pensive briefly before schooling her face and replying, "I see. So what course of action was decided upon?"

Before the Hokage could reply, his one-time team-mate and current adviser Homura interrupted, "that is none of your concern girl and this knowledge is only to be known by the council. You just do your job."

Instead of showing her ire at being talked down to like that, she simply kept her face void of emotion but her audience could still feel slight chill at the iciness in her words, "that may be _**adviser**_," she replied, stressing his rank, "but I can imagine what it is you want me to do and the seals necessary for such a thing often have quite a few side effects. Due to that I need to know exactly what it is that is going to be done so that I know when it will be _**safe **_to perform the sealing on him or your other plans may fail due to the sealing and once I've put them on him, they can't come off."

The Hokage smiled placatingly at her, amused by her outburst. "Of course Hitomi-chan. The course of action decided was to take genetic and sperm samples in order to repopulate the Uchiha clan, Sasuke won't know of the offspring by the way, then you are to place on him loyalty seals plus seals that won't let him get a certain distance away without supervision, send out a signal so his where abouts is known at all times and finally, a seal that will kill him and completely wipe all genetic coding if worse comes to pass. Oh yeah, something akin to the caged bird seal the Hyuuga clan uses that destroys any genetic coding from samples that leave the body such as skin, hair and blood would be nice as well."

Hitomi raised her eyes at that; the sheer number of seals needed by themselves would be difficult to safely combine but they were all complex blood seals making it even more difficult, "that's quite a lot Hokage-Sama but I better understand your requirements now, I should have everything prepared within a week with a few extra surprises that would be beneficial but it would be best if I did it straight after you collected your samples in the hospital as I'll need blood from several people to write the seals and some of the seals will need to be written into Sasuke's muscle underneath the skin."

"That will be fine Hitomi-Chan, come see me when you've everything prepared and I'll inform you where and when. You're dismissed now, everyone else stay; we still have matters to discuss." as the Hokage said that, Hitomi bowed briefly before turning on her heel and walked out the room, the last thing she heard as the door closed was the Hokage asking for suggestions on who to care for the future Uchiha offspring.

"Cherry Blossom here, I'm in position" a voice sounded over Hitomi's head piece while somewhere ahead an ominous shadow lurked.

"Origami here, in position and ready to go, confirmed red ribbon on target's ear." she replied

"..."

After several seconds of radio silence Kakashi spoke up, "Emo-Duck; you still with us?"

"DONT CALL ME THAT!" a voice screeched down the radio, hurting Kakashi's and the two girls' ears before his voice echoed around them. The figure that team seven was stalking stiffened slightly, looking for a threat before relaxing again, going back to creeping toward the village.

"... I'll take that as a yes. Now get ready to apprehend the target in three... Two... One...now!"

Instantly three figures that surrounded the ominous shadow at different points pounced on it, two being satisfied to stop just before reaching it while the third pounced on it, rolling around on the ground as its face was scratched violently by the cat they had been perusing.

"Sigh, Tora the cat successfully retrieved, mission accomplished." Hitomi said through the headset as she stood behind Sakura, wrapping her arms around her waist while Sakura held her hands as they both watched Sasuke struggle with Tora.

Sakura had been nervous at first, what with all the touching and holding her and Hitomi seemed to do but in the week since they first met at the academy, she had slowly gotten comfortable with it until now she even initiated contact at times; it also helped how Hitomi had assured her how she was straight and that there was no romantic feelings behind it, only a sort of sisterly affection and couldn't help it. The conversation then turned humorous when Hitomi explained to her about all the conclusions males would come to when seeing them together acting naturally, and all the advantages that would give them; Kakashi even explained this morning how they would make a good seduction pair that was useful in many Shinobi duties such as information gathering and assassination. Most people would probably be insulted by that but Sakura didn't mind too much, especially since it proved she was worth something as a ninja.

"not quite Hitomi-Chan," Kakashi said from behind them, no longer phased by how they act, "until we deliver Tora to the Daimyo's wife there is still a chance of Tora escaping, therefore delaying our mission until we've captured her again." the girls shuddered at that, they had been tracking and chasing Tora for several hours now and they were sure the cat had learned to use chakra, especially when it ran up, and then across a vertical wall.

Finally, Sasuke had managed to wrestle Tora into the cat carrier they had and locked the door, "finally," he said, standing up from his crouch, carrier in hand, "let's get this demon back to the tower so we can start training." and with that, stalked off not caring to look back to see if his team-mates or sensei were following.

"hold on Emo-Duck" Hitomi called, the three left behind chuckling at his agitation, "you're going the wrong way, the tower's this direction" Sasuke turned around, his shoulders hunched in agitation, only to see that Hitomi was correct as the top of the tower could be seen just above her outstretched hand. Without saying a word, Sasuke turned around, passed where they were standing and stomped of to the tower, this time going in the right direction.

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><p>Thanks to everyone who reviewed and added this story to their favouratealert list.

Now Q&A time, first this _**is** **not**_ going to be a yuri fic. I may have some experimentation but the pairing will be he in the end. Also I'm still looking for ideas about pairings so give me your thoughts via review or pm, I will use the most popular.  
><strong>xbamsod:<strong> currently information on my plans for akatsuki, including having met them, is top secret; no real reason i just dont want to give the plot away in review responces. Well that and it must be torutre mwahahahaha. Hitomi will know Nagato and Konan definately and yes they will still be after the bijuu and world domination.  
><strong>971brat:<strong> yes they will be like sisters and it wont be 'beat the fate out of Neji' but more 'beat the true meaning of fate into him'  
><strong>raw666:<strong> onhestly I didn't think of it like that but upon reading your comment I pissed myself for about five minutes so i'm going to work that in so thanks. Also while he'll act like cannon naruto did in the beginning, he will still have the avenger attitude with it rather than 'become hokage'  
><strong>near4EVER<strong> and **Wrin:** like I said above this isnt yuri but i may include some experimentation.


	5. Chapter 5

"Underlined" = thoughts

"**Bold"** = Jutsu, summon/demon/feral speak

"_Italics" = _thoughts

Disclaimer: read Chapter One, Nothing has changed since then.

*-*Important Author's Note, Please Read*-*

Okay, now originally I had decided on the pairing with Hitomi to be straight purely and simply as one of her goals was to restore the Uzumaki Clan. After playing around with some ideas I thought of a way to accomplish that without having to give birth to continue the Kekkai-Genkai; so after reading quite a few reviews about how the reader was disappointed in the fic not being a Yuri fic I decided to put it to a vote. Keep in mind however that there will be no pairing until after what would be the Cannon three year time skip. Your choices are as follows; should the pairing be straight, and with who; or should it be Yuri, and with who. In the case of the fic being Yuri, I may include more than one partner but no more than three. You may vote by review or P.M. but only one vote per reader will count.

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><p>Two hours later, they had finally completed their mission, declining a second one as they got paid and had trekked their way to training ground seven; the location of the KIA Memorial Stone and quite possibly the most remote training ground in Konoha that wasn't restricted for ANBU agents' personal use.<p>

"Well now, who has a suggestion for today's training session; we can do team tactics, brain-storming or how about some survival training?" Kakashi announced cheerfully with an over-exaggerated eye-smile.

Instantly, Sasuke was in his face, his hands clenched at his side, "fight me!" He demanded

"Um Sasuke-Kun, that doesn't really fit in with my idea of **'****team****'** training, what would the girls do?" Kakashi replied, not even bothering to take his eyes off his book and look at him. Before Sasuke could reply, or even start ranting and raving Hitomi quickly jumped in, a sickly-sweet smile on her face.

"No that's fine Kakashi-Sensei; you spar with Emo-Duck. I actually needed to teach Sakura a Jutsu anyway." Before anyone could blink, Sasuke had span round and would have grabbed Hitomi if Kakashi hadn't restrain him.

"What Jutsu? As an elite member of the elite Uchiha Clan, you should be teaching it me!" he shouted, not caring that he was one step away from being incapacitated by Kakashi.

Hitomi blinked before shrugging, humour evident in her eyes, "Well if you really want me to I will, though I'm not quite sure why you would want to know how to perform Jutsu's designed to help with Menstrual Cramps and similar ailments; to each their own I guess. Now the first one is called ..."

At the mere mention of 'Menstrual' both males blanched and when it sounded like she was actually going to name, describe and teach them a Jutsu for said feminine problem, they ran off to a different clearing at speeds that rivalled, if not surpassed the legendary Hiraishin. Sakura however simply looked confused.

"Menstrual cramps? Hitomi-Chan, they teach us the Jutsu for those in second year of the academy, why would I need to relearn them?"

"Oh I know, I just needed them gone and what better way to lose males than by girl talk of that nature? Anyway the Jutsu I actually wanted to teach you is something I found when I was looking through some of the more obscure sections in the Uzumaki library." Hearing how it was a rare, and considering what she knew of the Uzumaki Clan, probably powerful Jutsu; Sakura got stars in her eyes and she rushed over, almost hugging the life out of Hitomi who laughing at her actions, carried on once they both had calmed down. "It's a Genjutsu but rather than manipulating the victim's sense of sight, hearing and touch; you lace your voice with the moulded Chakra as you speak and directly control their actions. It's called **'The Sirens Thrall'** and from the reports I read, once mastered anyone who hears it will willingly submit to the user and do anything they ask. The more perverted they are the more easily effected they are and men are more effected from female users and visa-versa. The only exception to this is those whose sexual preferences are for those of the same sex, but the parameters are simply swapped around so it doesn't make too much of a difference."

"You're actually going to teach me such a valuable Clan Jutsu, why? Sakura asked; her voice full of astonishment.

"Well I've noticed you seem to be exceptional in Genjutsu so I thought this would suit you." She said earnestly, before her voice took on a teasingly sultry manner causing Sakura to blush furiously. "Besides, if you're going to be my seductress sister, you'll need some good techniques like that, especially since this one works best with two or more similar people using it in sync." During this, Hitomi had been inching closer, causing Sakura's blush to intensify and at the last second, she slapped Sakura's ass before returning to her normal, cheery self; ignoring Sakura's yelp of surprise. "Right, here's the scroll detailing the technique; read through it a few times and get used to the hand seals then we can get to practising; it'll make a good surprise for Kakashi if we've managed to synchronise it by then."

:~=*=~:

"Well then," Kakashi said in a bored tone as he read his Icha-Icha book, "It's been four hours now; plenty of time for the girls to have finished with their 'feminine training'; it should be safe to head back now." Sasuke, who showed multiple signs of losing the spars he and Kakashi had, was lying face first in the ground, his ass sticking up in the air with a suspicious hole where anus was, something that seemed to be a recurring theme with his fights with Kakashi, and as soon as Kakashi mentioned the word 'feminine', he paled and his face went from pleasurably dazed to one of complete horror before he staggered to his feet.

"No, too soon! I can still fight." He stumbled forward a few steps trying to raise his left fist when he collapsed in exhaustion, unable to move.

Kakashi sighed as he picked the weakly protesting Uchiha up, slinging him over his shoulder and walked back into the clearing he had left the girls in. As he entered the tree-line of the miniature forest that separated the two training grounds, he heard a musical voice, almost like singing that was slowly putting him into an increasing daze the further into the forest he got. It was only thanks to his years of experience as a Jounin that he didn't completely succumb to the heavenly voice; Sasuke having succumbed at the first audible note and now had vacant, glazed eyes as he drooled all over Kakashi's back. Saying that, if Kakashi didn't have a team to get back to, his years of experience wouldn't have got him past the second step. Idly he noted that it was lucky the voice was in the direction of his team otherwise not even his dead team-mates and Sensei coming back to life in the opposite direction could pull him from the path leading to the voices. Finally, he stepped into the clearing where he left the girls and seeing that they were ok, let down his guard and thus he was unprepared when two mesmerizingly musical voices hit him full blast; completely ripping away any shred of his free will and consciousness he may have managed to retain.

"Well, that was a success!" Hitomi said in a normal tone, a smug expression on her face as she walked over; an ink pot and fine bristle brush in her hands. "Now, it's time for some fun." She said with an 'evil genius' laugh as she drew some symbols on the piece of skin in front of each ear on both Kakashi and Sasuke before walking back to Sakura as she drew symbols on the palms of her hands.

"Okay, but what are we going to do and what's the purpose of the seals you drew on them and yourself?" Sakura asked; an evil, eager yet puzzled expression on her face as Hitomi drew the same seals on Sakura's hands.

"The seals are like the short range ear pieces we used for certain missions. We speak into the palm of our hand and the sound will be transmitted to the corresponding seal on Kakashi-Sensei or the Emo-Duck. Left hand goes to Kakashi-Sensei's left ear; right goes to Emo's right. Alternatively, my left goes to Emo's left ear and my right goes to Kakashi-Sensei's right." She explained before bringing her left hand to her mouth and applying the **'Siren's Thrall'** Jutsu to her voice, "testing, testing 123; Sasuke, do the chicken dance with audio."

The effect was immediate as Sasuke, regardless of his previous exhaustion, jumped off Kakashi's shoulder and began flapping his bent arms like a chicken as he began dancing and squawking in time to an imaginary beat. Sakura stood watching dumbly for several seconds before she fell over laughing her head off.

"Oh Kami, where's my camera," she managed to gasp out between laughs.

"Never mind that, direct Sasuke to follow Kakashi-Sensei and follow me." Hitomi replied, directing Kakashi as she jumped up to the trees.

:~=*=~:

"Come; gather round all ye followers of the great and holy 'Icha-Icha!" Kakashi screamed from atop a pedestal in the middle of Konoha's high street; the busiest street at that time of day. As people looked at him, many thought that he had finally snapped; he was standing with his feet shoulder length apart while leaning slightly backwards, his arms stretched out wide and he looked as if he was frozen mid process of doing star-jumps. To add to the already weird situation, he had forgone his usual face mask and instead of his normal Shinobi attire, he was wearing white monk/cult robes with the hood pulled down and located on the front and back of the robes were large, bold pictures of the Icha-Icha logo of a naked man in a thinking pose, one arm supporting his chin with the elbow resting on his knee, along with the Kanji for 'Icha-Icha' underneath in black.

"I have received word from the great Jiraiya-Sama; creator and author of the holy bible that is Icha-Icha! He has told me that each book is printed with a special seal and when we have gathered on top of the seal in front of you one thousand of each novel in the series and one golden edition of each novel, then use a special Jutsu to activate the seal; each and every book gathered will be transformed to contain the complete series! But better yet, the book won't be words but moving pictures and sound, much like a movie!

"So go forth my fellow devout followers of the all-mighty Icha-Icha; spread the word, bring your holy books and together we shall enact the holy ritual and gain the ultimate Icha-Icha prize!"

"Pft, idiot." One woman said, voicing all the women's thoughts, "Akihiro, let's go. Akihiro?" Looking around, the woman, plus others who had boyfriends/husbands/brothers/male friends with them, the women had all noticed that every male in a mile radius had mysteriously vanished. With an angry look on their faces, the women attempted to storm off only to find their feet were rooted to the spot, and they couldn't even twist their torsos.

"Hitomi, I don't get it," Sakura whispered from the rooftop where they were directing Kakashi's actions with-out being seen, Sasuke stood doing a silent chicken dance behind them. "What's the point of collecting all of these books together?"

Hitomi, who was lying on the same rooftop next to Sakura, looked up from the spectacle below her. Two hours had passed and they almost had all the books; all the males who had donated were now sporting the same robes as Kakashi, who was still in the same pose and was still blurting out the same message. All the men who had donated and swapped their clothes were aligned in rows in front of Kakashi, were positioned in a praying pose on the hands and knees and after a certain line from Kakashi; would raise their backs and arms, chant 'all hail Jiraiya-Sama, all hail Icha-Icha' then lower themselves again.

"It's quite simple Sakura; that seal the books are placed on actually only has two purposes, neither of which do what everyone believes. One is to make it so anyone who feels dislike towards Icha-Icha books can't move so they can clearly see what's happening; second, the seal won't let any paper that has entered its boundaries leave. Now shush, the next stage is about to begin."

As they looked down, they noticed that the group had indeed completed collecting the books and Hitomi then gave Kakashi a new instruction.

"The time has come my fellow followers; the holy books to be collected, done! The devout followers to assemble and show their worship, done! All that remains is to activate the seal and we shall be… Rewarded!" After finishing his speech, Kakashi raced through some hand-seals, ending on tiger and with a deep breath and inaudible mutter of '**Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu**', he spat out a large fireball; unknown to the males dressed in robes as their faces were facing the ground in their worship position, but clearly seen by the trapped bystanders, confusing them greatly.

As soon as the fireball was released, Hitomi cancelled the '**Sirens Thrall**' **Jutsu **and audio transmitter seal on Kakashi, and then watched on in amusement as Kakashi's face turned from confusion to horror as he slumped to his knees. After a brief flare of the books burning, the trapped bystanders and 'cultists' alike spent several seconds blinking the spots from their vision before as one, they turned their heads and looked upon where the books were, only to find that there was nothing there but ash and scorch marks; much to the pleasure of the cheering crowd of women and the occasional guy, but horror of the dumbstruck male 'cultists'.

"Nooooo" Kakashi cried out in anguish, snapping everyone's' attention to him. Instantly, angry mutters arose from the robe-clad 'cultists' and true to mob mentality, soon all of them were screaming out for Kakashi's blood. Kakashi must have realised this because as his head snapped up, it turned ghostly white and a wet patch appeared on the front of his robe before he disappeared into the distance screaming in terror; the angry mob close behind.

"Well, well Hitomi-Chan. You certainly have been busy haven't you?" A light, musical voice full of amusement spoke from behind them.

"Ky-Chan!" Hitomi squealed as she turned and launched herself at the woman, hugging the life out of her. While Hitomi was hugging the newcomer, Sakura took the time to observe her; she looked to be around a hundred and seventy centimetres in height, making her just shorter than their Sensei; she had crimson, ass length hair and her eyes were an unusual shade of reddish-purple.

"Ky-Chan, that behind you is Emo-Duck, otherwise known as Sasuke and this is Sakura, my seduction sister and future partner in infiltration, assassination and seduction missions. Sakura-Chan, this is Ky Uzumaki, a relative of mine and one of my mentors in Taijutsu." As Sakura and Ky said their greetings and got talking, Sakura found herself coming to like the red haired woman; finding all three of their personalities to be very similar. She even offered to teach her some **Genjutsu**!

"So Ky-Chan, how's everyone? And when are they going to come visit me?"

"Everyone's fine, though Dei-Chun is beginning to mope with the only one with appreciation for his explosions gone. Konan too because it was only your love of both eternal and 'in-the-moment' art that stopped Dei-Chun and Mr 'I play with dolls and hate waiting' from constantly arguing about which art is 'true' art."

"I'm sorry, but Dei-Chun? What does Chun mean?"

"Oh that," Ky chuckled, "you see, after knowing Dei-Chun for three years now, we still don't know if Dei-Chun's male or female."

Hitomi opened her mouth but was interrupted with the beeping of her watch. "Shit! Sorry about this Ky-Chan, Sakura-Chan but the Council has requested Emo-Duck and me for 'Clan meeting'," she said, making air quotes at Clan meeting, "I'll catch up with the two of you later." And with a kiss on Sakura's cheek and a final hug with Ky, Hitomi disappeared in her unique **Shunshin**, taking the still dancing Sasuke with her.

"Well then Sakura-Chan, what say I make good on my promise and start your instruction on Genjutsu?" For the second time in a week, the entirety of Fire Country, and possibly parts of land surrounding it, Could claim to be temporarily deafened by a squeal of happiness. Sakura, completely forgetting the fact she had only met Ky ten minutes ago, Glomped her and started hugging the life out of her; much like Hitomi did earlier, amusing Ky greatly; despite being born to different parents the girls really were two peas from the same pod.

:~=*=~:

"So how much sperm have they collected so far?" Hitomi asked the Hokage as side by side, they both looked through a screen of one-way glass as they watched in morbid fascination as Medic-Nins collect a decent amount of hair, blood, urine and skin samples in the operating theatre while a sort of suction machine was attached to Sasuke's erect, two inch dick while a green faced Medic-Nin held Sasuke's three over-sized balls with two green glowing hands; changing their position in a rotated pattern every few minutes.

"Disturbingly, quite a lot." the head Medic-Nin answered from behind as he read the latest report. "The fact he has three balls while disturbing, allows us to drain one completely before moving on and by the time we have drained the second one and moved onto the third, we have been able to completely rejuvenate the first. The only limit we have is time, the Medic-Nin's Chakra supply and storage space."

"Wouldn't that be the case with just two balls?" Hitomi asked confused, though despite her wishes and disgust, she couldn't tear her eyes away from the scene.

"Unfortunately not, with two balls we would have to halt the process to give time for the first to rejuvenate and the body can only handle this **Jutsu** once a week maximum, no matter how prolonged the **Jutsu **is held for."

Eventually, the Medic-Nin in charge of ensuring there was actually enough sperm regenerated to be collected felt her Chakra supply getting low and deciding that they had collected enough; because two gallons was more than enough when they had expected at most, two shot-glass's worth, ended the technique and aided the others as they started to pack up. Once the Medic-Nins had packed up all the equipment bar the genetic samples and had taken their leave, minus the head Medic-Nin who was going to assist Hitomi, the three made their way into the operating theatre, while the Hokage motioned to an ANBU agent to gather the council Hitomi pierced Sasuke's arm with a blood collection needle and tube which she then attached to a vacuum tub as she drained blood from him. Upon seeing the confused faces of the Hokage and head Medic-Nin, she rolled her eyes as she explained.

"I'm using blood seals; usually they work best using the blood of the one the seals will affect." Looking behind the two, Hitomi sighed as she saw that all _three _of the councils had arrived instead of the just Shinobi Council. Obviously the loyalty of the ANBU agent sent was questionable. Sighing again, she gave both the head Medic-Nin and the Hokage a blood collection tube and vacuum container each as well.

"The seal that determines how far he can roam unsupervised needs a blood sample of the distance source, which for now, will be the two of you. I'll ad more people when need be." She explained when their faces re-gained their confused look.

"what is the meaning of this? I thought we made it clear that we were to be made aware of any situation involving Uchiha-Sama Sarutobi, and that we would be the ones to make decisions regarding him." The rather obese head of the Civilian Council said once they had finally reached the three, the rest of the Civilians nodding their heads and making other gestures of agreement. Frowning slightly, Hitomi just ignored them completely, walking towards the operating table that Sasuke was still lying unconscious on; the Hokage and head medic-nin followed her, ignoring the civilians as well.

"If the two of you would donate some blood now, I can get to the sealing."

"Don't you dare ignore us Sarutobi! And you, who do you think you are?" one of the lesser Civilian council members spoke up, though a golden flash that lit up the room cut off anything more they were going to say as they all dropped to the floor.

"Don't worry, they're simply unconscious. It will last for at least a day and when they come too they won't remember a thing. You should really get a handle on them Hokage-Sama, if you keep letting them walk all over you like this then there is no telling what they might try or be doing behind your back." Hitomi causally stated, though the disdain in her voice was clear.

Hiruzen didn't say anything but simply frowned in thought as he absently motioned to an ANBU member to remove the unconscious Civilian Council. In short order, both Hiruzen and the head medic-nin had both drawn blood and Hitomi poured it into a bowl that already contained hers and Sasuke's blood as she stirred the mixture. Walking over to the prone Sasuke, Hitomi began drawing lines and a collection of random shapes onto various parts of Sasuke's skin; indicating to the medic-nin where she wanted him to cut and peel back the layers of Sasuke's skin and muscle. For the next five hours, the Hokage and remaining two councils watched on as using both the blood mixture, her chakra and ordinary sealing ink, Hitomi drew seals onto different areas of Sasuke; both onto various muscle layers and on unblemished skin. The only part to get any physical reaction from the council members, which happened to be phantom pain from the males and disgust from the females, was when Hitomi directed the medic-nin to slice up Sasuke penis after using a Jutsu to make it erect, revealing the inside of the Urethra and cut open his ball sack to let his three testicles fall out.

After the sealing had finished and Sasuke had been taken back home, the Hokage, the councils and Hitomi had relocated back to the council chambers for Hitomi to give her report; the head medic-nin having decided to go take a very long, hot shower before looking for an available Yamanaka to remove the memories of having to see the 'last faithful' Uchiha's manhood. While the council members looked on, Hitomi was arranging her notes into a semblance of order having mixed them up while looking through them during the sealing.

"Okay," she said at last, looking up at her audience as she finished arranging her notes on the table, "before I explain the seals placed on Sasuke, does anyone have any questions for me?"

"I have one," Inoichi Yamanaka spoke up after a few moments of everyone remaining silent, "That technique you used to knock out the civilian council members, it was surprisingly similar to one my own clan's Jutsu and I was wondering where you learnt it." Although it wasn't obvious from looking at him, there was a very noticeable edge to his voice and who could blame him; anyone would be just as, if not more incensed about the stealing of their family's techniques. It was the reason why many Shinobi, allied and hostile alike hated the Uchiha clan.

"Don't worry Yamanaka-Sama; I don't have the Yamanaka's Kekkai-Genkai so even if I knew any of your family's techniques, I still wouldn't be able to perform them. However, the Uzumaki clan has been around for a very long time and many of our members were skilled in recreating techniques just from witnessing them and speaking to their performers about them. While it is similar, it isn't nearly as strong or effective as your Clans techniques. Does anyone else have any questions?"

"I have one, though it is more of a suggestion to be put to vote rather than a question." Danzo announced, "I suggest that Hitomi teaches our Shinobi her knowledge of Fuinjutsu so that the knowledge isn't lost or forgotten." He said in an almost condescending tone as he smirked, causing most of the council to frown and Hitomi grit her teeth.

"May I make a suggestion honoured council?" Hitomi replied, a deadly edge to her voice, "anyone voting in favour for that, or repeated attempts to vote for it" queue death-glare at Danzo, "and I will execute those responsible under the Clan Protection Charter clause 14b. Am I in _anyway_ unclear?"

"Moving on." Sarutobi said "Perhaps it would be best if you moved straight onto explaining the seals placed on Uchiha-San, and how they will affect him."

After giving one last glare towards Danzo, Hitomi sighed before starting her explanation. "Very well. First of all I have placed upon him a total of fifty-four seals on various locations and don't bother trying to replicate them; each and every seal is disguised so unless you knew the Uzumaki Fuinjutsu code all you would see is our trademark spiral. There are ten seals that deal with the killing of genetic samples that leave the body without the appropriate companion seal; two expansion seals that monitor the body's life-force, and activates the first ten seals upon recognising death thus destroying all genetic coding from his body. There are three seals to monitor his conscious and sub-conscious thoughts, an extra two to pick up on when he is thinking of doing or in the act of enacting traitorous thoughts and activities, and one that will cause him to implement a pre-programmed command where he will stop any and all activity and report immediately to his nearest 'Parole Officer' so to speak which will need the identifying seals placed on them. That command also includes him explaining the thought/action that caused the seal to activate in the first place. The rest of the seals are tracking seals; loyalty seals preventing him from attacking any Shinobi with a 'safe' seal placed on them; a seal to kill him if he goes past the two hundred mile boundary from the nearest Parole Officer; one that prevents him from telling any Shinobi without the safe-seal anything that is confidential to outsiders and finaly; one to remotely kill him should the loyalty, tracking and distance control seals fail due to a Time-Space Jutsu or a conflicting seal being placed on him. Also, as I said in the previous meeting when you asked me to devise some seals I told you that they can't be taken off him once placed on; that is because the seals have now bonded to his DNA and as far has his body knows, those seals have always been a part of him so they will be restored by any healing factor, whether it's his natural healing or Jutsu induced." What Hitomi didn't say was that she had added two extra seals after she had surreptitiously collected her own genetic samples from him; one that made him permanently sterile and one to make sure his bloodline never activated no matter what anyone tried.

Sarutobi, who had been writing this down, smiled at her before thanking her and dismissed her. Hitomi just bowed and without another word, turned around and left with her notes; checking her watch for the time and once she saw it was past Tea time, decided to try that Ramen stand she had seen the other day.

* * *

><p>Okay, sorry about the wait but to make it up to everyone, here's an Omake for your enjoyment. While this could be seen as part of the story, it won't effect it in any way and is just an Omake.<p>

Kakashi groaned as he slowly woke to the sun burning his still closed eyes; his head was pounding, his ass hurt like hell and his mouth tasted extremely weird and was dry as a bone. What the hell happened last night?

"_Okay Kakashi, think. First there was training with my team which turned into roughing the Uchiha brat up, Kami you must be rolling in your grave Obito. Next was the heavenly voices followed by the blackout; I woke up to see the precious Icha-Icha burned and was chased by angry fellow devotees who for some reason, blamed me for the sacrilege burning. After finally losing them I visited the 'Drunken Jounin' night club trying to get the memory of the holy books burning out of my mind; then the last thing I remember was getting into a drinking contest with…."_

"Oh SHIT, GUY!" Kakashi screamed, jolting upright in his bed.

"you called my Eternal Rival?" Might Guy questioned as he walked into Kakashi's bedroom, clad only in Snot Green briefs and eating Kakashi's cereal.

"Umm, Guy; did we, you know… last night?" Kakashi stuttered as he began to go green.

"Oh yes my hip rival, you certainly showed me your Fires Of Youth!" Guy said, nodding his head proudly. "All those crunches, lunges and squats; why you taught me exercises I've never heard of before. Though i triumphed in the end and soon showed you my Fires are more youthful than yours my rival when you had to quit. No longer paying attention to Guy, Kakashi sank back into bed, relief flooding him as he began verbalising thanks to Kami. "Well then my Eternal Rival, I must say goodbye as I need to meet my team. Just remember Kakashi; let your Fires Of Youth burn bright!" he screamed before jumping out the open bedroom window and running through the lunch-time rush in the streets.

Kakashi relaxed and was about to slip back off into slumber when he tensed at the feel of squirming next to him. Throwing the quilt back, he let out a girly scream upon seeing the sight of a naked Uchiha lying next to him, pressed into his equally naked crotch. He was about to jump up, chuck the Uchiha out of his apartment and drown himself in his mother's special 'Memory-Erasing' booze concoction when he froze at the familiar 'click and flash' of a camera. Slowly looking up in horror, he fell out of bed and started kicking his legs and banging his arms as he began sobbing in despair as he saw the blur of someone running away from his apartment in a high Jounin speed; his life, no reputation was over!

Meanwhile, Hailey and Sakura had just stopped running once they were sure no one was following them; grinning madly as they began calmly walking to the camera store to get their picture printed. It would cost the money they earned from their last ten missions to print several hundred copies of the evidence that their third teammate and Sensei were gay together (even though they had been victims of the **'Siren's Thrall'**) but it would so be worth it.

**Review Response Time.**

**Lilly887787: **The Emo-Duck will die eventually, in the most embarrassing manner I can think of. Also, I hope this chapter answered your question.  
><strong>Can'tAGirlGetSomeSleep: <strong>Three guesses where Kyuubi is.

Thanks to everyone else who reviewed. As always, reviews and constructive criticism are welcomed but any pointless flames or non-constructive criticism will be ignored and deleted.


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